Sunday, May 17, 2015


Most of my blog posts and status on Facebook seem not to do men justice by focusing too much on women. It's not my intention at all, though, like my status few days ago, saying if a man loves a woman, he shouldn't steal her purity because love is not stealing. Not that I am trying to say man is the one who steals, always, and woman is the victim, always. No. I know it really well; how it works. I have a brother in Christ who literally cried after he made this mistake with his girlfriend that costed him his purity, and it was his girlfriend who initiated it. And yes, it's not completely that girls' fault, because my friend agreed to do that together, but we also realize that we are broken people living in the broken world. Spirit is willing but flesh is weak. Same when a girl gives her purity to her boyfriend, it's not 100% the boy's fault, too. I know it's mutual.

However, what breaks my heart so much is that we don't treat sex as something holy and precious anymore. Now it's so cheap that we toss it away freely, using 'love' as the currency. Is that love even real? I am not saying that having sex before marriage can't be based on love. Yes it can. But, I just don't understand. When a man loves us so much, wouldn't he try to protect us and not to harm us? To keep us from anything that can ruin our future, like being pregnant? Wouldn't a man of integrity and a man who loves Christ honor our purity above anything else before putting a ring on our finger, because he knows he can't return it once we have given it to him? When a man sleeps with his girlfriend without wearing any protection, isn't it enough to prove how selfish he is?

Same when a woman lures her boyfriend to have sex, Wouldn't a woman of Christ who loves you dearly try to protect your mind, your eyes, and your desire through the way she treats you, touches you, and dresses for you? She knows your weakness. Would she provoke you if she knows you won't be able to control it? Would she ruin your future and stop you from your dream by seducing you to sleep with her and with the risk of becoming a father when you are not even ready?

Or else, when the relationship doesn't work out as we expect it, wouldn't it be so hard for one of us to move on with life? Because when we have sex, half of our soul goes with our partner. Isn't it something we shouldn't play with? Aren't we supposed to protect the most fragile part of people whom we love the most, instead of playing with it and tossing it when we are done? Wouldn't that be the real meaning of love? Wouldn't it trouble us when our loved ones have to deal with insecurity and guilt?  

So yeah, my brothers and sisters in Christ, I think the way our partner treats us show how much they respect and love us. And ladies, we can't only expect guys to be the gentlemen, without being willing to be shaped by Christ to be the women who deserve them. So my point is, the types of gentlemen that you want, that you expect, that you wish for, be so. The types of jerks that you hate, that you try to avoid, that you can't stand, don't be so.


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